When we were young, children really, we all had dreams. Some of us dreamed that one day we would rule the world as the leader of the greatest country in the free world, while others dreamed of the family, house, and white picket fence. No matter what the dream was, it was important to us. How important was it really? How many of us achieved our childhood dreams?
Let me take a little detour here and go off on a slightly different tangent. Recently my uncle was diagnosed with Pancreatic and Liver Cancer. As you can imagine, this was a fairly traumatizing event for my family. My good friend Scott, being the cool guy that he is, sent me a link of a video of Professor Randy Pausch’s final lecture at Carnegie Melon University. Carnegie Melon had this program where they asked distinguished faculty to hypothetically give a “final” lecture on what deeply matters to them and what wisdom they would try to impart if they knew it was their last chance. Mr. Pausch, is an innovative Computer Science Teacher who is recognized for his work in virtual reality. He was diagnosed with metastatic pancreatic cancer in September 2006. In August 2007 the cancer had spread and he was told he had, maybe six months, to live. In September 2007 he delivered his now famous “Final Lecture.”
His final lecture inspired me to look at my dreams and just take a look at life. I always appreciated and was very thankful for my life. I have, up to this point, lived a very blessed and wonderful life, but have I achieved my dreams? What are my dreams?
So here I am, sitting in my room, late on a Friday night contemplating what those dreams are. An hour has passed and yet I still can’t think of what those dreams are or even were. As a child I was given every opportunity. I know my grandparents hoped I would follow in my grandfather’s steps and become a State Senator. I knew my parents wanted me to be a productive member of society and to be happy. But what did I want? Truth is I liked the easy road, kind of being pointed in a certain direction, and for the most part having my path laid out for me. I came to realize though that is not really my dream, that is not my wants, that was not my real desire. So I look back and think what did I love.
I always loved sports. I was never that good at them, although I did have my fair share of athletic accolades, but I loved them. It didn’t matter if it was boxing, baseball, football, hockey, basketball, if it was a sport I loved it. So I think my first dream was to be a part of professional sports. This is a dream I guess I am still working on. The cool thing is, this was a similar dream of Randy Pausch’s. He never achieved this dream, but he learned a lot from sports and right now that is my accomplishment, I have learned a lot from sports, but if it truly is a dream you can accomplish it. I guess I would say that if nothing else I got experience, which according to Mr. Pausch is what you get when you didn’t get what you wanted. Now tt would be easy for people to say well you are not big enough, fast enough, smart enough, or athletic enough to be a professional athlete or be a part of professional sports. This would be a true statement, but really those things are all just brick walls, and as Mr. Pausch likes to say brick walls are not stopping points, they are tests which are in your path to prove how much you want something. And if I really want this I will overcome the brick wall and make this dream a reality.
After writing all of this, I realized that another way to figure out my dreams was to look back on life and see what brick walls I faced and climbed over. I think part of my family’s hope for me to be a politician included things like becoming a lawyer. I didn’t go to law school for them, I went because God called me to, and I found I really enjoyed the law. This adventure of law school was not without its brick walls. When I first applied to the law school I went to, because I was called to go there, I didn’t get in. I was put on a waiting list probably because I didn’t have the grades or what not. Haha in fact I didn’t even have the grades coming out of high school to get into the University of Hawaii. My first attempt at college didn’t go that smoothly. My second, third, and fourth attempts didn’t go much better, but I persevered and pressed on. Eventually on the fifth try, I graduated from college, nine and a half years later. Anyways so back to the story at hand, so while I was put on a waiting list I moved to San Diego, even though I did not get into law school yet. I knew that is what I wanted to do and that was the school I wanted to go. As a little side note I did get into UH’s law school, but I didn’t go there because I wasn’t called to and well haha I wasn’t good enough coming out of high school so haha why should I be good enough now, haha ok. Anyways so I am in San Diego and not admitted to law school. Soon enough the call came and I was admitted to California Western School of Law. One brick wall climbed on my way to becoming a lawyer. Then I found out I couldn’t get my school loans. This wasn’t stopping me either. Instead I went to different banks and scoured the internet for the law school loans I needed, and you know what I found them. So now I am in law school, but as you probably guessed from my many attempts at school, school is not my thing, so I struggled. But I knew I wanted this and so I pressed on and in two short years Brick Wall number two was scaled. I came home to Hawaii and took the bar exam, not once, not twice, but three times and I still don’t know if I have passed (I will find out in May). Brick wall number three, I am almost over that one and will keep on climbing that suckah until I am over. So what was my other dream, it is to be a lawyer. Which sort of I guess is related to the dream about my career. In terms of career, my dream job would be to be a District Court Judge in Kaneohe. Within that I would love to be a public defender and a JAG officer that serves in Afghanistan and Iraq, on my path to achieving that dream of being a district court judge.
In terms of my personal life, I guess there is a dream there as well. I want the beautiful wife, 2.3 kids, and house on the ocean with air conditioning and a pool, which I guess is kind of weird because I don’t really know how to swim, but those are the things that I love. While this dream has not been achieved yet either, a lot of brick walls have surprisingly popped up already. Buying a house is a tough chore living in Hawaii. When you had student loans that are larger than some folks mortgages well it makes it even tougher, but I will not let that stop me, no instead I will climb that wall, maybe sit at the top and look at the amazing journey I have been on and turn to face the future that awaits me. I also haven’t found the wife yet, which sort of precludes the 2.3 children but again that is just another wall to climb.
So those are my dreams. These are the things that I am willing to fight for and persevere for. These are the things that I am willing to sacrifice for. These are the things that no brick wall, no matter how huge or how imposing it may seem will stop me from achieving. I guess the last thought before I wrap this up will be this, and again another quote from the amazing Mr. Pausch, We can not change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand. What are you willing to do to achieve your dreams? Will you let brick walls stop you and make you turn tail and run or will you climb those walls, maybe changing the way you would have played the hand that is dealt to you.
In the end you know who dominated and was the ultimate winner. Although it wasn’t a total loss for Miss Serena, she did get to team up with me in a game of taboo and we beat up on her mom and brother. All in all it was a fun day and I had a great time hanging with Serena and her ohana.